Creation Myth

There was this turtle floating around in the void. It was the only thing. It was happy, it liked the quiet. And then one day this bird appeared. Let’s party, said the bird. Let’s fuck shit up. The turtle ignored him, which drove the bird crazy. He couldn’t understand why the turtle wasn’t into partying with him. Bird started making stuff, to get Turtle’s attention. Lakes. Mountains. Clouds. Trees. The turtle wasn’t impressed. The bird said, What the fuck? It created humans next. This the turtle noticed, as one smashed his shell with a stone. Whoops, said the bird.